Softening the Pain (cont.)
As we continue with the thought of having another conversation with our loved one...complete these sentences with words or thoughts you would say to them. Express anything on your mind and heart. Write your responses in a private notebook, or you may reply here if you want others to see your responses:
* "It feels GOOD when I think of....."
* "It HURTS when I think of....."
* "It makes me ANGRY when I think of....."
* "I feel GUILTY when I think of....."
There is a difference between guilt and regret. We might feel guilty if we made a decision and WE KNEW what would happen. We KNEW the end result and we did it anyway...it may lead to guilt feelings.
Regret is the feeling that we would do or say things different IF we could go back. But often we are so busy, or in a fog, that we are not thinking of actions and words. GUILT and REGRET are both NORMAL in the grief journey.
Express everything in these areas that you would say to your loved one. It may be a sentence or many paragraphs. You are the only one to know when everything has been said.
Next we will look at the final 4 sentences. Thank you for the courage and determination to put words to your grief...to mourn.
Bob Willis, author
"A Guide for Grievers"
"JESUS: The CRUCIFIED CAREGIVER"