Softening the Pain (cont)
Today is the final session of presenting "tools" to soften the pain of loss. Imagine you could talk with your loved one again to express the words of your heart and mind.
* "I wish I had....."
* "Something I always wanted to tell you was....."
* "I would like to have heard you say....."
* "I want you to know....."
Many times in life we are so busy we do not take time to say things we intend to say. If death occurs before we express those things there can be a feeling of helplessness. What can we do with those thoughts now? They still need to be verbalized and expressed.
This series of "softening the pain" sentences presents the opportunity to put words to grief. If there is unfinished business in the relationship, if there are regrets or guilt, hurts, apologies, or even expressions of gratitude...these "tools" can guide the process of putting words to the grief so it can be expressed. The process of putting words to feelings is where MOURNING occurs...the outward expression of grief.
These "tools" can be used for any loss in life. They can even be helpful to guide conversations with someone still alive.
But they are WORTHLESS until they are APPLIED. I urge you to sincerely write a letter to your loved one based upon these "softening the pain" tools. Write until there is nothing else to say. Yes, it may be emotional. Grief is emotional. But our goal is to soften the pain.
Tomorrow we will look at the next step...an overview...and living as a griever.
Thank you for following this series...but thank you most of all for applying these "tools" to your life. See you tomorrow. 🙏⚘❤
Bob Willis, author
"A Guide for Grievers"
"JESUS: The CRUCIFIED CAREGIVER"