"A MOURNING MOMENT" By bob Willis

Anniversaries

A friend has asked for suggestions to observe the death anniversary of a loved one. We have two choices. We can try to ignore it and get slammed with reality . . . or we can make plans to observe the occasion. Of course, it is healthier to take the initiative and make plans. Here are some suggestions, and of course, you are welcome to share what works best for you.

*visit the gravesite. You may go alone or take someone who feels comfortable with your emotions.
*light a candle next to their photo and spend one minute in memories of them. This is the ideal time to talk with them. 
*plant something to nourish and take care of. Plant a tree, a bush, or flowers in their memory.
*gather friends for a meal, perhaps their favorite food. Share memories of them, expect laughter and tears.
*write an anniversary letter to them. Express what you have learned about grief, about life, and relationships. Write what you feel, what you miss, and anything on your mind. Keep the letter, perhaps writing another one on birthdays or holidays. This is a healthy way for your grief to be identified and expressed.
*reach out to a safe friend who has experienced a similar loss and share memories. You are not alone.
Can you share what has helped you on death anniversaries and other special days?
Bob Willis, author
"A Guide for Grievers"
"JESUS: The CRUCIFIED CAREGIVER"
​